Twitter in real life sounds dumb

What would happen if instead of sending out 140 characters in a tweet you stood in a park and declared your short message to the world around you?

Well, as I just witnessed on CollegeHumor Sketches on Hulu.com, when someone walking down a sidewalk shouts out “My eyelashes are legit today. ROAR” tweeted by “Jersey Shore’s” Snooki, it sounds a bit more ridiculous out load than it would being read in a Twitter stream. (Though the tweet is ridiculous in itself.)

My husband recently noted that Twitter is the epitome of vanity. How is it that someone can be so full of herself that she must declare to the world how important it is that her armpits smell like “Sponge Bob fever” (@SolangeKnowles).

If I were to set up a soapbox on the corner of my street and shout out my latest tweets:

“Great! RT @AP: BREAKING: Ohio governor announces he’ll sign executive order cracking down on dangerous exotic pets.”

“& how many Iraqis? RT @washingtonpost: 4,478 members of the U.S. military died in #Iraq since the war began in 2003″

“RT @CommonDreams: Obama: Reject the #TarSands Pipeline http://ow.ly/74P59#NoKXL”

“Obama announces withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq by January http://yhoo.it/mX0UVY#hooray! #itsabouttime”

Try saying those out loud. Strange, isn’t it?

Of course, I’m not a celebrity, so I would never tweet like @KourtneyKardashan:

“Do ants have dicks?”

And maybe that’s what people who follow celebrities want to know. Maybe this is just another human quirk that I have yet to understand.

“I hate leprachauns. LOL” (@Shaq)

“I can’t believe my grandma is making me take out the garbage. I’m rich! F$&#k this! I’m going home. I don’t need this shit” @50cent

But, @50cent has 5 million followers. I have 862. ‘Nuff said.

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One thought on “Twitter in real life sounds dumb

  1. Haha, I don’t even want to try to say them outloud. Too funny. I also don’t follow celebs, and now feel totally validated for that choice. Seriously, Kim, what IS that?

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